The time is always right to do the right thing.
In every moment, we fight a constant battle against complacency. Things are not okay, and we should never pretend that they are.
Without tension, we wait. Without a deadline, we meander. Without urgency, it’s easier to stall.
The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
Criticism
Posted on Monday, February 27, 2023
Last updated on Saturday, August 15, 2026 at 4:27 PM
The act of criticizing someone undeniably carries a hefty negative connotation.
Many of our preconceived notions of criticism entail personal feuds or grudges, scolding, chastising, humiliation, ridicule, and the shame, embarrassment, fear, or resentment that these actions inevitably precipitate.
But why is this? If we think about it, offering constructive feedback to others is perhaps one of the greatest, most generous contributions we can make in someone else’s life. It is the act of sharing our wisdom, of connecting the lessons learned from our own experiences with those of others, of implicitly declaring our belief in the value of each of our individual perspectives of life.
When we criticize with a sense of interpersonal resentment, when we seek to belittle or disparage others because of who they are or what they represent, what are we really doing? When the criticism becomes personal, when it becomes about teaching someone a lesson, when we predispose ourselves to hate someone—the very essence of someone’s existence and being—and not what they did, what is it that we’re trying to do? No one consciously and actively chose in their childhood precisely which personality traits and characteristics they would take and ultimately what type of person they would become. So are we leading a crusade against the circumstances of their upbringing? Their family members and friends? Their parents? The parents of their parents? Are we shaking our fist at God or the universe because they conspired to create such a flawed being capable of making such terrible mistakes? When we’re all a work in progress as imperfect, flawed, and defective beings, what grounds do we have to hold negative feelings against anyone without being hypocritical?
And when we receive criticism, why are we so inclined to feel fear, shame, or often resentment in return, when it is precisely what we need to improve as human beings? Why do we not merely judge the criticism based on the validity of its points and not on the person saying it or how they are saying it? If it’s not useful based on our analysis, then we can simply let go and move on. And if it is useful, we have all the more to gain.
There is nothing rational about assigning negative emotion to the giving or the receiving of criticism. So the question I wish to posit today is this: what is the ultimate social function of this interconnectedness between emotion and criticism? Do we need to be scolded, humiliated, ridiculed, or chastised—causing us to feel shame, fear, or resentment in the process—to learn the important lessons of life? Is there something about the inherent nature of heated conversations and deep-seated grudges, something about the shame and embarrassment we inflict that enables progress in and of itself, thus rationalizing a seemingly irrational, shortsighted, impulsive act? To what extent are these tendencies innately built into our psyche, and to what extent are they cultural?
Should you scold and potentially hit your child to teach them a lesson after they tried playing with fire?
Should you hold a grudge against coworkers that don’t do their fair share of the work?
Should you be angry at your spouse if they cheated on you?
Should you send angry tweets to a divisive public figure that propagates toxic ideologies that you vehemently disagree with?
Should we publicly decry and humiliate child predators, war criminals, or human traffickers?
There are no easy answers to these questions—no way to circumvent the need to understand the minute nuances of each and every significant or insignificant situation we will encounter in our day-to-day life. No—I don’t believe that it is feasible to fully depersonalize criticism; as humans, the constraints of our psychological design make it nearly impossible to extricate the feelings from both the criticism we give and receive alike. But what we can do is ask ourselves how to better criticize, how to evoke the emotions we want to evoke, and how to stimulate positive change while working within the confines of the human psyche. The first step is to empathize with the people who are on the receiving end of these forms of derisive criticism—to ask ourselves if the amount of suffering and mental distress we will inflict is worth the apparent value of teaching them a lesson.
It is when we neglect to ask ourselves these questions—when we impulsively and indiscriminately criticize according to our own whim—that we risk degrading our relationships with one another in an already chaotic, uncertain world. We have the potential to devolve from productive civil discourse into senseless and angry banter, from teaching your child to be an upright, respectable human being into inflicting lifelong childhood trauma that will sap them of countless opportunities in life, from offering a helping hand to someone in need into pushing them to the brink of depression or suicide.
Posted on Monday, February 27, 2023
Appears in
- right thing, right nowIn every moment, we fight a constant battle against complacency. Things are not okay, and we should never pretend that they are.
- wayfinding—for yourself, and for othersThe hapless cycle of trial and error and the wearisome vacillation between starting and quitting isn't a rite of passage. Not everything has to be learned the hard way. Where our distinct paths in this uncertain life converge, we can—and should—help each other along the way.
Along the same lines
Posted on Monday, February 27, 2023
Public Interest
Posted on Tuesday, February 14, 2023
Last updated on Saturday, August 15, 2026 at 4:27 PM
In 1950s and 1960s America, television had transformed from a fledgling industry into one of the most significant cultural forces in the 20th century, and as it began to prioritize airing lowbrow, mindless, and crass entertainment to maximize viewership, it inevitably garnered significant criticism from those concerned with its long term impact on the culture. In 1961, in response to these concerns, Newton Minow, former chairman of the FCC, broadcasted his speech “Television and the Public Interest.”
Here is a notable excerpt from that speech:
“Your industry possesses the most powerful voice in America. It has an inescapable duty to make that voice ring with intelligence and with leadership. In a few years, this exciting industry has grown from a novelty to an instrument of overwhelming impact on the American people. It should be making ready for the kind of leadership that newspapers and magazines assumed years ago, to make our people aware of their world.
Ours has been called the jet age, the atomic age, the space age. It is also, I submit, the television age. And just as history will decide whether the leaders of today's world employed the atom to destroy the world or rebuild it for mankind's benefit, so will history decide whether today's broadcasters employed their powerful voice to enrich the people or to debase them.”
As Seth Godin would argue, culture is not meant to serve capitalism; capitalism is meant to serve culture. But television was far from the only significant industry that would flip this dynamic to service the shortsighted, selfish, and profligate ambitions of corporate America. As time would tell, other core aspects of American life would degenerate into vast wastelands alongside television.
The restaurant and fast food industry did not serve the public interest. They have worked to surround us with cheap, available, and addictive products that were designed for the very purpose of exploiting our desire for convenience while simultaneously preying on our impulses for fatty, sugary, and processed food. It is certainly no mystery how obesity—and all its related health conditions and diseases—ended up ravaging this country for decades.
The pornographic and adult entertainment industry did not serve the public interest. They have no issue perpetuating the abuse and exploitation of young women. They have no issue propagating media that significantly contributes to anxiety, isolation, and depression among young men. They have no issue warping our perceptions on sex and relationships by surrounding us with cheap, instant gratification that desensitizes us. And with the advent of the internet, this industry has never been more prolific, and thus never more pernicious.
The tobacco industry, the alcohol industry, and Big Tech did not serve the public interest. They will not hesitate to addict us to our death if it means making the extra dime. They feed on our frenzied obsession to stay glued to our devices to stay up to date on what everyone else is doing, our compulsion to reach for the box of cigarettes on our work break, and our yearning to go to the bar when we want to vent or unwind. We are compelled by these sensations to take our minds away from the chaos of reality and numb our seemingly endless plight. And as mental health as a whole continues to deteriorate in our societies, more and more individuals will fall victim to these devices to merely cope with life.
But the severity of these addictions are as much of a cultural phenomenon as they are a neurobiological one. The restaurant and fast food industry couldn’t have survived without shifting our perceptions of what types of foods and what types of diets are acceptable or normal. The pornographic industry couldn’t have survived without the kind of cultural apathy and negligence to directly confront and teach what constitutes positive relationships and a healthy love and sex life. The alcohol, tobacco, and technology conglomerates can not survive without our continued refusal to educate our populace on healthy coping strategies for the hardships of their life—the incredibly stress and anxiety-inducing social structures that we ourselves perpetuate. When this is all that we’ve known for generations, we inevitably become inured to these ways of life, so much so that it becomes normal, justified, and upheld by generations that don’t know that there’s anything better.
Because we live in a society that accommodates entities with the sole intent of preying on our impulses and primal desires, our modern life is characterized by a fight against ourselves. We are forced to learn to starve our dopaminergic habits because, left unbridled, they will inexorably rot our brain. Self-restraint—this process of building the mental fortitude to resist temptation and instant gratification in pursuit of a better life—is increasingly seen as a virtue, in fact, a necessity, to triumph over the malignant forces in our modern capitalistic world. As someone who was fortunate enough to break free of their vices, it’s easy to claim that self-restraint is the answer to our plight. It’s easy to lecture others and blame them for being mentally weak and hedonistic.
But this is selfish. When the majority of our fellow citizens have already succumbed to their vices, when they have no one beside them to teach them those lessons of self-restraint and no alternative but to be enticed by the instant gratification that envelops them, things can begin to fall apart. Temptation and addiction will always afflict our society, and self-restraint and vigilance when it comes to our sensual pleasures is something that we always have to put into practice. But blaming others and putting ourselves on a moral pedestal is as detrimental to our society as these destructive industries.
We can only serve the public interest when, as a nation, we collectively recognize the aspects of our culture that sustain the industries that blatantly capitalize on human weakness for their selfish gain. If we put our minds and our hearts to it, we can build a life for our future generations where the easiest, most available solutions to our hunger, our desire for love or sex, or our need to cope with stress aren’t absolutely horrible for our physical and mental health.
Posted on Tuesday, February 14, 2023
The Cost of a Human Life
Posted on Thursday, January 19, 2023
Last updated on Saturday, August 15, 2026 at 4:27 PM
It was estimated that over $20 million was spent extracting the 33 miners that were trapped in the 2010 Copiapó mining accident. That's over $600,000 per life. How many millions of dollars were spent trying to devise ways to save three astronauts in the Apollo 13 mission? How many millions were spent trying to save the 47 lives that were aboard the FV Alaska Ranger? To rescue the 24 hostages held in the Iranian embassy in 1980?
If you have any semblance of a moral compass, you'll have likely told yourself by now, "there is no price for a human life."
Ostensibly, we have no problem spending an enormous sum of money to save human lives. We tell ourselves that putting a price tag on human lives is immoral. But I want us to consider this notion from another perspective.
If tomorrow we decided to start taking all the vehicles that aren't public transportation and commercial vehicles off the road, in an instant we have the opportunity to save over one million people that die from automobile accidents each year.
But we tell ourselves, "that's too much."
We ask ourselves, "How will people get to work? How many billions of dollars will we lose?"
We tell ourselves, "We can't just shut down the entirety of human civilization for the sake of a couple thousand people per day."
But when will we say enough is enough? Where do we draw the line?
Can we define one million deaths as negligible? Do we convince ourselves that those are “unavoidable” losses, as the necessary cost to run an industrialized society?
What about ten million deaths—now is it too much?
Whether we want to admit it or not, that in order to strike a balance between maintaining convenience within society and not inflicting an egregious degree of mass murder, we put a price tag on human lives.
The truth is, we do have the resources to change things if we really wanted to. If we have the capacity to produce nine million cars in a year, enough gas to fuel a hundred million of them each day, and the labor and resources needed to pave and maintain hundreds of thousands of square miles of roads and parking lots, we also have the capacity to redesign cities where people aren’t forced to drive cars to go about their life; we have the capacity to accommodate safe walking and biking, to provide convenient access to daily necessities without the need to drive, to greatly improve the efficiency of public transport in those cities, and to invest in the development and implementation of self-driving vehicles, which are infinitely safer.
But we don’t believe it’s possible, and, like many other glaring problems in our society, we turn a blind eye when we’re asked to change.
What about the countless individuals that take their own lives every day?
that are unjustly murdered each day from homicide, gang violence, and wars?
that perish from lung cancer, heart disease, diabetes, and other life-threatening conditions?
When will we together, as a society, admit that we're doing an abysmal job at looking after each other's mental health?
at ensuring every neighborhood in our nation is free of poverty, crime, and injustice?
at organizing healthcare and disseminating knowledge about what a healthy life looks like?
Instead, we like to look for cheap solutions.
Here, have a useless suicide hotline number that we'll advertise en masse to people that have already lost their faith in society because we're too lazy to actually tackle the leading root causes of suicide, to call out the bad actors among us that are responsible for deteriorating our mental health and cluttering our lives with backwards, oppressive social conventions regarding personal responsibility, work, and happiness.
Here, let's promote anti-violence demonstrations and protests instead of doing the hard work of dutifully educating each other as citizens and ensuring we all have access basic necessities in life so we don't have to have a reason to kill each other over it.
Here, let's allocate some of our money to fund cancer research programs, diabetes centers, and programs to help alcoholics and smokers because we're too infatuated with capitalism to rebuke the fast food, alcohol, and tobacco corporations that, unbridled, will addict the general populace to its death for an extra penny.
Here, let's legislate a few traffic safety laws here and there and promulgate defensive driving techniques to help drivers anticipate and be prepared for dangerous situations while we simultaneous churn out millions on top of millions more cars every year, pave ever more roads and parking lots for those cars to clog up, destroy the planet in the process, and perpetuate an overly car-centric society that makes it inhospitable and inconvenient for those that don't drive and downright life-threatening for anyone that does drive.
No, I'm not saying any of these solutions are inherently bad or unproductive by design. But all of them are band-aid solutions to treat the problems deeply ingrained in the design of our nation.
Why is it that we have no problem spending millions to rescue a few individuals that were inopportunely caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, but we're not willing to save millions in the act of ceasing to drive cars or protesting against careless urban design and the profligate greed of the automobile industry? It's because a rescue mission doesn't challenge the status quo. It's seen as a noble and brave demonstration of the human spirit.
But radically changing the way we govern our nation and design the fabric of our society? To shift our mindset to learn how to cooperate with each other as citizens? To alter the culture and norms we live and breathe by? To give up the luxuries and privileges we have accrued over decades of progress? Absurd.
We will preserve the status quo at almost any cost, even if the cost we're discussing is the human life.
Posted on Thursday, January 19, 2023
The time is always right to do the right thing.
Without tension, we wait. Without a deadline, we meander. Without urgency, it’s easier to stall.
Added in 2026
Along the same lines
- Parallel Worldsan essay
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- The foundation of all real skills is this one: the confidence and permission to talk to one anot…Seth Godin
- Mindfulness is healthy, it’s professional, and it allows us to be our best self. It is also madd…Seth Godin
- The alternative is to bring actual wonder to the conversation, to be with a person in their stor…Seth Godin
- Because significant organizations spend most of their time and energy not being where they were…Seth Godin
Added in 2026
The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes, nor between political parties either—but right through every human heart—and through all human hearts. This line shifts. Inside us, it oscillates with the years. And even within hearts overwhelmed by evil, one small bridgehead of good is retained.
Added in 2026
The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.
Added in 2026
Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.
Added in 2026
When you want to help people, you tell them the truth. When you want to help yourself, you tell them what they want to hear.
Added in 2026
Concentrate every minute like a Roman—like a man—on doing what’s in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly, with justice. And on freeing yourself from all other distractions. Yes, you can—if you do everything as if it were the last thing you were doing in your life, and stop being aimless, stop letting your emotions override what your mind tells you, stop being hypocritical, self-centered, irritable. You see how few things you have to do to live a satisfying and reverent life? If you can manage this, that’s all even the gods can ask of you.
Added in 2026
Along the same lines
- Deathan essay
- The Fear of Missing Outan essay
- Do not seek for things to happen the way you want them to; rather, wish that what happens happen…Epictetus
- Not a dancer but a wrestler: waiting, poised, and dug in, for sudden assaults.Marcus Aurelius
- Think of yourself as dead. You have lived your life. Now take what's left and live it properly.Marcus Aurelius
- The first step: Don't be anxious. Nature controls it all. And before long you'll be no one, nowh…Marcus Aurelius
- It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor.Seneca
- The cucumber is bitter? Then throw it out. There are brambles in the path? Then go around them.…Marcus Aurelius
Added in 2026